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是什麼時候開始的呢?妳好像討厭我了
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不喜歡我找妳討抱抱撒嬌,不喜歡我找妳一起玩遊戲,不喜歡我當妳的跟屁蟲
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妳不喜歡我走路都擋到妳前面,可是明明就是我先走的
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妳不喜歡我拿妳東西,可是我是在幫妳找它
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妳拜託我去拿衛生紙時,一個淺淺的笑,就足夠我開心好久好久
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是什麼時候開始的呢?我好像討厭妳了
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『自己的東西自己拿,不要找我』,妳一直都跟我這麼說,所以,妳自己的東西妳也自己拿,不要找我
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冬天很冷,我想偷懶一天不洗澡,妳就嫌我髒,我明明就很乾淨,哪像妳,髒的每天都要洗澡洗頭
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好,我髒,我去洗澡,妳又說我跟妳搶浴室,罵我到底是有什麼問題
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坐在地上腳伸直,妳走過去絆倒,就怪我說幹嘛把腳亂放,可是我已經放很久了,沒有人絆倒啊,是妳自己笨手笨腳
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『她不承認我是她妹妹,我不承認她是我姊姊』,我一直是這麼認為的
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直到某一天,媽媽把我丟給妳,她要出門
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妳要吃東西之前會順便問我一句要不要吃;妳要出去之前會順便問我要不要幫我買什麼
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簡單的照顧,簡單的交流,我卻懵了
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不是很討厭我嗎?搶浴室搶電視搶玩具搶電腦,每個東西妳都跟我搶,討厭我,幹嘛還要找我說話?
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不管我我也不會死的,會活的好好的
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不回答妳就隨便幫我弄點東西吃,就說了不要管我嘛!我死不了!
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這是妳在意我,喜歡我,所以照顧我的意思嗎?
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然後妳一臉嫌棄的叫我全部吃掉不要浪費,不然會害妳被媽媽罵
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所以是嫌棄我,討厭我,但是被媽媽逼著只好照顧我?
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我不懂,真的不懂
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我們之間,五年的距離,我跨不過去
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那......就維持這個平衡好了
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妳會照顧我,我會掩護妳,這樣就好了
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有姊姊的感覺是怎樣我不懂,從小我就覺得“姊姊”是個什麼都要跟我搶的生物,有沒有都沒差別
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可是維持現在這樣的平衡......
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很開心
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所以,謝謝
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吾乃羲狐,請多多指教哟
吾深有同感呢......
卿的文筆真好,平淡的文字卻又觸動人心
加油哟
哈哈 我也好想要有個姊姊陪我