3. 第一次懇親
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這不是肯X雞?這不是肯X雞!
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朋友之中最晚當兵的我,早就知道這是廣告效果!
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進去裡面吃幾頓牢飯.....不對?是軍中營養午餐....
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不用5天....三天?額?兩天.....
6TBz3fhZLsgkPcIVyvE1r5dQYDCl72NHuAmMax0o
就算只帶你家巷口隔夜的阿婆鹹酥雞?
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你都會激發出比『吞食天地2』中的BONUS GAME....
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還要強上幾倍狼吞虎嚥的超能力!?
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最晚當兵的好處....就是先看朋友的矬樣!
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最晚當兵的壞處....就是一群朋友嘲笑你的矬樣!
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想想懇親後~下午就順便放假.....
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宋啦!終於可以回家看當兵時候....
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最愛看也最需要的---『愛情動作大片』!
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4.自家的『 軍中樂園 』
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跟鄰兵開玩笑的左欺敵....右欺敵?
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聽著交頭接耳的討論著,
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待會要去苗栗還是漢口路?
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寵幸哪位已經預約好的妃子!
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午夜~
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手裡拿著t108....看著屏幕!
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思念著在地球另一端的『她』?
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想著!不知是否能安然退伍後....
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搭飛機過去與她相會~
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突然.....
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一個嘲笑自己的自己?
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慢慢的由鼠蹊部發出....
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向他靠攏的靡靡之音?
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自己:裝純情給誰看啊?
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自己:再過幾天你又要回去地獄啦!
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自己:來嘛!放在書桌抽屜裡面,
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自己:你用『惡靈古堡』壓在下面的她.....
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自己:正渴求著現在的你~
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自己:去解救她!
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我被說服了.....
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只留小檯燈.....
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房間門反鎖.....
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打開電腦螢幕....
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戴上耳機.....
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用『自己』說服我到一半的時候....
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握著早已預熱的『慾之棍』...
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前去與她共享~奇淫合歡?!
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5. 抽籤
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聽著好像已經退伍好幾次的鄰兵們....
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說著~
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阿榮甲:跟你說啦!要是不想抽到金馬獎?
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趕快去拿麥克筆,
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在掌心畫一顆眼睛....這樣就不會抽到了!
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阿榮乙:哪是?等一下看誰抽到空軍?
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趕快去跟他握手....
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阿榮丙:我覺得應該是整天上廁所完....
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都不要洗手!這樣才會有好手氣!?
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聽著這些怪力亂神的言論?
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我的心跟明鏡一樣....不為所動!
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你以為我有致勝妙招?當然沒有....
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那是因為我已經向連長申請,參加幹訓班的考試!
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但若是測試沒過....則以今天抽籤的結果為主!
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為什麼想當班長?
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絕對不是因為我國小想當班長!
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最主要的原因是---「距離」!
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當兵時,本來薪水就少到快被鬼抓走!
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而且人在他鄉~就算你不搭車回家....
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也會因為孤單寂寞覺得冷?想找人放鬆放鬆!
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在仗著只考體適能....我更是信心滿滿!
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